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The 3 reasons-you need to know-why finding love after 35 doesn’t have to be hard!
Ok, you’re over 35 and you’re still single you. You’re scared. You doubt God has a plan for you where
finding love is concerned and you have simply decided that being single is your lot in life.
Let’s make finding love easier and more intentional.
You ready?
In this blog, you’re going to discover the 3 reasons you need to know to start being more confident
in finding love. If you’ve ever found yourself fearful that you’re running out of time, you’re going to
die single, or spend all your nights alone read on.
Let’s Clear The Air
It doesn’t matter your age whether you’re 35 or 90-finding love is possible at any age. I recently saw
a video on YouTube where a woman got married at 90 years old-YES, 90 years old-this couple lives
right here in Jamaica. Women are still finding love all over the world despite the pandemic, and its
lingering effects, because your God is bigger than the things you are up against-the things you think
hinders you or you think are unsurmountable obstacles.
The first reason-finding love after 35 doesn’t have to be hard is:
God Has A Specific Plan For Your Life
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Are you one of those women who believed that you would have been married by now? Or that you should be married by X age?
You had everything mapped out and planned according to your timelines. Did a lot of other things fell into place but not marriage?
As the time has flown by-Are you left believing that maybe marriage isn’t for you?
That maybe those who have told you that marriage isn’t for you are right? Maybe they know something you don’t know-have you ever felt that way?
Ladies, know this, God has the final say.
In Jeremiah 29:11, For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.
When God spoke these famous words of hope to Jeremiah- Israel was in captivity. The future and a hope looked far-fetched but not with God who writes the script of your life.
So, go find out His thoughts about you.
You can’t know someone’s thoughts unless you ask them or talk to them-then they can choose to share their thoughts/plans with you.
Ladies, Go read Psalm 139 If you doubt that God knows every intricate detail of your life.
v. 16 says all the days of my life are written in Your book before 1 of them came to pass…
Think about this,
Have you consulted God about what He has written about you in His Book? Have you ever spoken to Him about His plan for your life-all the areas of your life?
You have prayed about your career move; you have prayed about your relocation plans, you have prayed about so many different things but have you REALLY prayed/consulted God about His
thoughts concerning marriage for you?
I don’t mean declarations or writing down the characteristics you want your husband to have (even this shouldn’t be done without consulting God and listening to what He says, but that’s a different blog).
What I mean is this,
Have you asked God about His specific plans/His thoughts for your life?
If you haven’t,
Go to Him-find the answers that will settle this debate for good.
God’s plan is different for each person. For each woman-For each of His daughters. No 2 blueprints are the same so STOP comparing yourself with other women.
Your life is different
Your call is different
Your purpose is different
Your journey is different
The reason for your wait is different.
Getting a glimpse of God’s divine blueprint- the one He has created specifically with your Name on it
will change the way you wait and will be well worth the effort to see what’s on it.
You need to take time to understand God’s specific plan for your life because this is key to you
thriving in every season you find yourself -whether you are waiting or reaping rewards.
But ladies,
Be warned growing in intimacy with God takes time especially if your relationship hasn’t been deep on every level. Understanding and identifying what God’s plan for your life is will take time and effort on your part but it is the surest way to silence your fear of the future. It is the surest way to stop questioning your Father’s heart toward you.
What to do?
Set aside quality time (meaning no distractions outwardly or inwardly)
Empty your heart of your plans, empty your heart of your fears and be open to hearing what God’s plan for you is.
Knowing God’s plan for your life will settle the doubts and silence your fears.
As your intimacy with God deepens, He may choose to reveal His secrets to you while you wait on Him. Nothing is beyond God-He can give you date, time, name, everything. All that you need is hidden in Him but you have to go deep to find them.
Use these 17 “I AM” Affirmation cards to remind you of what God says about you. No need to stay depressed, hopeless or with out joy. Start filing your mind and your mouth with truth Say after me- I AM LOVED.
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You Can Trust God’s Timing
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The second reason finding love after 35 doesn’t have to be hard is you can trust God’s timing.
First thing- God’s plans for your life are outside of time as you know it (you are more acquainted with the world’s TIME but God’s plans are outside of this because He created time-He isn’t bound by times rules).
I know this may be a tough one considering that we live in a world that dwells on expiry dates and tells you every day the best time to accomplish or set goals.
But I would say to you Stop rushing; Stop being fearful; Stop the desperation; Stop the cynicism; Stop the doubt- because you know what? It shows.
It shows in your eyes, it shows in the way you speak, it shows in the way you carry yourself; Ladies these things show up in the way you live your life.
Know this,
God holds the time that matters firmly in His hands. His appointed time-His set time is not shaken or restricted by or cancelled out by the world’s time. His time rules overall. Chronos (world’s time) must bow and take a back seat when God’s Kairos time shows up.
God’s timing may be weird, I know, but it is impeccable, and it can surprise and leave you with your mouth wide open. It can leave you dumbfounded.
Listen, Lazarus was dead and buried- decay had set in but Jesus called Him out of the grave. You may think your life stinks, and everybody knows it-no need to hide that your love life is dead, and buried- everybody knows. But Lady, you serve a God who is the Resurrection and the Life. His plans are not restricted by time or worldly explanations.
God operates in His appointed time, and you should live your life mindful of that truth. Psalm 31: 14- 15 says, “But as for me, I trust in You, O Lord; I say, “You are my God.” My times are in Your hand.”
So, stop saying and believing this LIE “I’m running out of time.” Further, resist the fear and scarcity mindset- that says there aren’t enough godly men out there; only old men are in my church, or all the good men are taken.
No, they’re not!
The Bible says in James 4:7 … Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you.
Submit to God-say, I trust you; my times are in your hands; you are in charge of my life. Then choose to believe God and not the devil and he will flee with his lies and the fears that they bring to your heart and the doubt that wants to stay there.
Now is the time to know your God-He is fully aware of what’s going on to find peace, confidence and
assurance as you await God’s timing.
Sometimes there is what you may call delay but it is God who know He has to prepare you for marriage. He knows you need it. Preparation is key. Get before Him. Ask. He wants to get you ready for what He has for you because His ultimate joy is to see you living the abundant life that Christ died to give you. God doesn’t want to see you live 1 more day cast down or filled with dread about your future. He doesn’t want you to doubt His love or to believe for 1 moment that His plans have not and will not bring you to your expected end.
What to do?
Trust God’s timing. His plans for you are in His timing. Know that You are safe in His timing.
Use these 17 “I AM” Affirmation cards to remind you of what God says about you. No need to stay depressed, hopeless or with out joy. Start filing your mind and your mouth with truth Say after me- I AM LOVED.
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God Keeps His Promise
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The third reason finding love after 35 doesn’t have to be hard is that God keeps His promise. He isfaithful and trustworthy.
Psalm 37 verse 4 is a very famous scripture verse Delight yourself also in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Ladies let me say this this scripture isn’t calling you to try to please God so that He will reward you
No. No.No.
Delighting yourself in the LORD is more than God pleasing for rewards. It means being enamoured by God. It means your world revolves around God. All that you desire is in Him. It means falling in love with God with all your heart. His desires become your desires
So what do you desire?
To be loved?-find love in God- God is love and He loves unconditionally
To be married?-He is your first Husband (Isaiah 54: 5 says Thy Maker is Thy Husband
To be confident?- Philippians 1:6 says- being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.
To walk in purpose?- Hear Exodus 9:16 But I have raised you up for this very purpose, that I might show you my power and that my name might be proclaimed in all the earth”.
Remember, your purpose for your life must follow God’s purpose for your life. As you go after your desires, you must keep in mind God’s purpose and plans for your life-they must be the same.
“Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s plan/purpose that prevails” (Proverbs 19:21).
God’s plans might not be clear now, but you can trust His hand and His Timing in your life. Your heart will find true satisfaction when it is aligned with God’s plan/purpose.
Go find out what it is.
Know this ladies, When you have God, you have all you need.
That’s His promise
He will keep His word to you.
It is time to stop thinking that maybe you missed your opportunity, and it is too late, but is it?
Just as God made a promise to restore and prosper Jerusalem- what has God promised you? Hear
what He says to you:
At the Right Time, I the Lord, will make it happen (Is 60:22)
Conclusion
Three reasons to give you some peace as you wait, don’t forget these:
1. That God has a specific plan for your life
2. You can trust God’s timing
3. That God keeps His promise-He can be trusted
Be patient. Prepare.